Enlightening Commentary

For The Children Update

Posted on September 25, 2014

Way back in May, news broke that Chicago’s favorite mayor was speeding and running more red lights than a gangbanger in a rented black Dodge Charger hightailing it from a shooting. Barely 4 months later, it’s pretty much the same shit, different day:

“In May, the mayor said he had instructed his bodyguards to slow down and obey traffic laws like everyone else. They haven’t.

At the time, Rahm Emanuel publicly dressed down his drivers.

“I said, ‘Follow the law, nobody’s above the law, slow down, period,'” Emanuel said in May.

But within an hour of speaking those words, cameras clocked the mayor’s motorcade speeding 12 miles an hour over the limit near Douglas Park.

In the four months since the I-Team first uncovered the mayor’s chauffeurs chafing against the rules of the road, they have accrued eight more violations, an average of a violation every other week.”

In the mayor’s defense, he’s not the one driving… he’s in the backseat telling his driver to “step on it asshole!” and “blow that light you fuckin’ prick!“.

So we made that last part up, anyway, our colleagues over at Crime in Wrigleyville & Boystown have a rundown of the infractions.

Keep it short and to the point. Name calling and similar stupidity will be deleted. If you insist on writing several paragraphs, start your own blog.

  1. a September 25, 2014 at 8:54 pm

    the law, what law – thats for other people

    • Gargoyle September 26, 2014 at 12:56 am

      What other people and what laws? This is Chiraq, the Wild West, Chicago, Gotham City, “you come here, you better come strapped” city.

      Surprised Rahm hasn’t actually pulled a drive-by already. Fun fact: the “Drive-by” originated in Chicago.

  2. Mayberry RFD September 26, 2014 at 7:31 am

    Much like our community organizer and chief, this is just Ram’s version of Animal Farm – we the plebes have to follow laws and work for these racist animals, while they enjoy the fruits of our labor. Hooray for the pigs!!!

  3. john cass September 26, 2014 at 3:56 pm

    Rahm “Surrender-your-guns-right-now-to-be-safer” Emanuel will just switch to some other unmarked car. Nothing’s changing [except the population of Chicago].

  4. Tiny Dancer September 26, 2014 at 8:38 pm

    I think he’s in the back saying, “Hold me closer.” What an arrogant asshole. I would drive like I own the place too if I were Mayor. Chuckle.

  5. ralph braseth September 27, 2014 at 7:12 am

    An exclusive story broken by the I-team. Hmmm, let’s put this exclusive story into context.

    Murder capital.
    Growing number of poor.
    Racial polarization of city grows.
    African-Americans heading back South for safety.
    Highest city tax rate in country.
    Major businesses threaten to split.

    It’s a stupid story. And there is no investigation. Just find a dolt to look at city video tape.

    Who gives a damn if the mayor is speeding. You haven’t done it?

    That ain’t news folks.

    It’s empty space and impacts exactly no one.

  6. Kim September 27, 2014 at 8:31 am

    Hey Ralph, others may speed around but are not elected and do not pretend to care about the safety of the other citizens of this city. Rahm wants Chicagoans to believe he gives a rats ass about those he’s sworn to serve. I think we deserve to know the truth. Just because others break the law, that doesn’t justify Rahm’s offenses.

    • W. Earp October 15, 2014 at 10:02 pm

      Tiny Dancer has another Speed Camera installed at 3200 S. Archer this one is in front of a Auto salvage yard . There is not a School, or Park any were close to this vicinity !! Just a junk yard !!
      For the Children My Ass ! It’s time for us all to come together, and vote this Clown out of our Town . Karen are thoughts, and Prayers are with You, and Your Family God Speed !! Bob you got to bring us all together as one city, one people united for what is right for all Chicagoan’s !!

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