The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Saturday, February 25th, 2017

No snow dibsA 50° drop from the highs of Wednesday to the lows of Saturday morning will always put a damper on things.

Stupidity Tally as of 10:00p: 2 killed, 8 wounded
2016 weekend tally: 2 killed, 26 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 0 killed, 5 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 6 killed, 5 wounded

Friday 2/25
All quiet on the Western and Southern fronts
Saturday 2/26
1:00a 6500 S Drexel, Woodlawn, M/20
1:00a 6500 S Drexel, Woodlawn, M/38

1:00a 6500 S Drexel, Woodlawn, F/29
3:55a 2900 N Sayre, Montclare, F/19
7:20a 3300 N Central, Portage Park, M/38
7:20a 3300 N Central, Portage Park, M/40
8:15a 7400 S Baldwin, South Shore, F/?
8:15a 7400 S Baldwin, South Shore, M/?
8:15a 7400 S Baldwin, South Shore, M/?
6:00p 6200 S Rhodes, Woodlawn, M/38

Key:
shooting
homicide
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday

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Arborists

Posted on Wednesday, February 22nd, 2017

Fallen TreeFirst the city decides to un-ban plastic bags thereby choking salmon and baby birds everywhere, now they’ve gone ahead and doomed us all with their institutional arborism.

“Mayor Rahm Emanuel made slight changes Wednesday to his plan to spend almost $15 million in leftover property tax rebate money, avoiding what could have been more sizable, embarrassing City Council opposition to the package.

After many council members balked at the mayor’s idea to spend $500,000 of the unused money to plant 1,000 trees, he agreed to pull that out and instead put that cash toward anti-violence technology like a test program to create crime-fighting intelligence centers.

That allowed some of those who had been in opposition to change their votes, saving Emanuel from having to publicly confront a larger bloc of aldermen voting against him and calling into question his commitment to fighting violence.

Aldermen approved his new proposal by a 35-10 vote Wednesday.

Freshman Ald. Raymond Lopez, 15th, had fronted the opposition to the mayor’s plan, saying the planned tree planting and lack of street-level anti-violence funding showed the wrong priorities at a time many Chicago neighborhoods are beset by violent crime.

But he came around to support it after the changes, with Emanuel also agreeing to find at least $1 million to finance toward violence interruption programs like the CeaseFire program.”

Unlike these “programs” and most other things the city blows cash on, trees are at least tangible and provide much needed shade for evidence technicians to gather crime scene evidence that the states attorneys can ignore.

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The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Friday, February 17th, 2017

Lost in SpaceTypically we have to wait until April for that first warm spring weekend however this year we’re two months ahead of schedule. Danger.

Final Stupidity Tally: 5 killed, 26 wounded
2016 weekend tally: 5 killed, 28 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 3 killed, 9 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 3 killed, 7 wounded

Friday 2/17
1:00p 800 W 76th, Auburn Gresham, M/23
6:00p 1400 W 71st, Englewood, M/31
7:45p 300 E Kensington, West Pullman, M/23
8:55p 8300 S Winchester, Auburn Gresham, M/24
11:25p 5100 W Concord, Austin, M/13
11:25p 5100 W Concord, Austin, M/16
Saturday 2/18
2:55a 5000 S Ashland, New City, M/23
2:55a 5000 S Ashland, New City, M/28
4:25a 4500 S Wood, New City, M/29
4:25a 4500 S Wood, New City, M/26
4:25a 4500 S Wood, New City, M/32
3:30p 4900 W Van Buren, Austin, M/33
4:00p 6600 S Springfield, West Lawn, M/28
8:35p 7300 S Aberdeen, Englewood, M/36
8:55p 9800 S Oglesby, South Deering, M/28
8:55p 1200 N Lawler, Austin, M/43
10:00p 7900 S Talman, Ashburn, M/26
10:30p Dan Ryan at 43rd St, Fuller Park, M/?
10:30p 4700 W West End, Austin, M/31 (selfie)
10:50p 7100 S Rhodes, Grand Crossing, F/18
10:50p 7100 S Rhodes, Grand Crossing, F/36
Sunday 2/19
2:50a 1800 S Laflin, Lower West Side, M/30
6:00a 4200 W Roosevelt, North Lawndale, M/49
5:00p 6400 Sangamon, Englewood, M/32
5:30p 7400 S Kenwood, South Shore, M/38
7:45p 9500 S Houston, South Deering, M/21
8:15p 7600 S Peoria, Auburn Gresham, M/13
9:00p 1000 N Pulaski, Humboldt Park, M/36
10:00p 2200 E 84th, South Chicago, M/69
11:50p 5000 S Drexel, Kenwood, F/33
Monday Overtime
1:50a 3100 W Madison, Garfield Park, M/33

Key:
shooting
homicide
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday

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Street Justice Cont’d

Posted on Wednesday, February 15th, 2017

Self Defense ZoneLast week we noted the story of a local car thief being given a taxpayer funded tour of the ER courtesy of concerned residents. Now residents in the far western neighborhood of Dunning are none too keen about having shitheads inquire about gang their membership.

From a pristine block of worker cottages near the city’s western border, Daniel is seven years and 15 miles removed from his former life as a gang member.

On Monday afternoon, he got a shocking reminder of that past.

Just before 5 p.m., the 23-year-old, who’s using a pseudonym out of fear for his safety, was walking with his brother in an alley behind the 3600 block of North Oriole Avenue when a man pulled up next to them in a green Honda sedan and demanded to know their gang affiliation, he said.

“He was revving his engine, and when we didn’t say nothing, he said ‘Hey, I’m talking to you, n—-!” said Daniel.

The driver veered out of the alley, wheeled back around and the man fired six gunshots from his window before screeching away, he said.

“Almost all my neighbors feel less safe now,” said Jeff Eichler, examining a bullet hole in the rear bumper of his Hummer. “I’ve even heard some people talking about moving.”

“This is what’s happening everywhere now,” Eichler said. “I told the cops that if they don’t do anything and the guy comes back, I might have to drop him myself.

Be warned Dunning dwellers, for if such an event were to occur, the outrage mobile will be quickly dispatched for scalp processing. Just ask Mt. Greenwood.

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The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Friday, February 10th, 2017

Chicago Daily News Headline from Feb 14th, 1929.Tuesday marks the 88th anniversary of the St. Valentine’s Day Massacre or what today equals a slow summer weekend.

Final Stupidity Tally: 8 killed, 21 wounded
2016 weekend tally: 7 killed, 14 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 2 killed, 7 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 2 killed, 2 wounded

Friday 2/10
2:30p 3700 W Roosevelt, North Lawndale, M/27
5:50p 3944 N Western, North Center, F/55 (story)
6:50p 10300 S Corliss, Pullman, M/17
6:50p 10300 S Corliss, Pullman, M/17
8:55p 6100 S Halsted, Englewood, M/27
Saturday 2/11
1:25a 3800 W Roosevelt, North Lawndale, M/27
1:40a 5600 W Fulton, Austin, M/24
2:25a 300 N Lorel, Austin, M/29
4:45a 1200 W Lawrence, Uptown, F/29
6:55a 100 N Menard, Austin, M/33
7:15p 5600 S Winchester, Englewood, F/12
7:40p 6300 S King, Grand Crossing, F/11
(story)
8:40p 100 N Mayfield, Austin, F/21
8:40p 100 N Mayfield, Austin, F/25
8:40p 100 N Mayfield, Austin, M/25
8:40p 100 N Mayfield, Austin, M/18
Sunday 2/12
12:45a 1500 N Massasoit, Austin, M/16
2:50a 400 W Evergreen, Near North Side, M/24
3:30a 7100 S Cyril, South Shore, M/23
3:30a 500 E 80th, Chatham, M/40
1:45p 2400 E 75th, South Shore, M/45
1:45p 2400 E 75th, South Shore, M/54
1:55p 1400 W 84th, Auburn Gresham, M/25
4:30p 1200 N Karlov, Humboldt Park, M/37
8:10p 5700 W Fullerton, Belmont Cragin, M/28
9:15p 700 N Harding, Humboldt Park, M/29
9:40p 7700 S Cregier, South Shore, M/16
11:00p 1100 S Whipple, North Lawndale, M/30
Monday Overtime
3:35a 11500 S Indiana, West Pullman, M/34

Key:
shooting
homicide
police involved
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday

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Street Justice

Posted on Wednesday, February 8th, 2017

Charles Bronson - Death WishWe suspect that stories like these are more common than reported and/or will become more commonplace as the CPD stays fetal.

“The shooting of a 17-year-old on Sunday might have been “street justice” for his attempts to break into a car, a police official said.

Speaking at a meeting of residents Tuesday evening, Near West Police District Cmdr. Ed Kulbida said the shooting near Racine Avenue and Huron Street came after the teen and someone else was seen breaking into someone’s car. They were followed and the teen was shot in the leg.

“These people in the neighborhood, they didn’t like that,” said Kulbida of the break-ins, adding of the pair, “I don’t think they’ll do that again.”

The police report said the shooting occurred at 5:35 p.m. and that the shots were fired from the back seat of a dark-colored car. The teen took himself to Stroger Hospital.

On Monday, some in a crowd of more than 250 residents in the basement of the Goldblatt’s Bros. Building, 1625 W. Chicago Ave., laughed at the explanation while others appeared uneasy.”

It’s likely that the neighborhood criminal justice system will provide a stronger deterrent against such future actions than Cook County’s.

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The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Friday, February 3rd, 2017

Super Bowl XX

Final Stupidity Tally: 3 killed, 18 wounded
2016 weekend tally: 5 killed, 23 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 2 killed, 9 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 2 killed, 10 wounded

Friday 2/3
5:10p 11400 S Stewart, Roseland, M/15
10:10p 11200 S Avenue G, East Side, M/19
Saturday 2/4
3:30a 2100 E 97th, South Deering, M/15
5:30a 7900 S Phillips, South Chicago, M/23
4:45p 8000 S Marshfield, Auburn Gresham, M/23
6:40p 1000 N Lamon, Austin, M/25
9:30p 5700 W Adams, Austin, M/28
10:35p 9000 S Phillips, Calumet Heights, M/21
10:35p 9000 S Phillips, Calumet Heights, M/25
Sunday 2/5
3:15a 32 W 110th Pl, Roseland, M/59
9:45a 2900 W Adams, Garfield Park, M/26
12:05p 2900 N Laramie, Belmont Cragin, F/42
2:00p 1300 S Troy, North Lawndale, M/22
5:35p 600 N Racine, West Town, M/17
9:30p 4700 S Leamington, Garfield Ridge, M/27
9:30p 4700 S Leamington, Garfield Ridge, F/29
10:10p 1100 E 79th Pl, Avalon Park, F/31
11:15p 1200 W 108th Pl, Morgan Park, M/21
11:40p 200 S Cicero, Austin, M/21
Monday Overtime
12:05a 8200 S Blackstone, Avalon Park, F/39
12:05a 8200 S Blackstone, Avalon Park, M/40
Two people found shot to death in Brighton Park home

Key:
shooting
homicide
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday

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January Wrap-up

Posted on Wednesday, February 1st, 2017

Carnac the Magnificent Last January set the tone for 2016 and this January just wrapped up singing the same tune. Buckle up. It’s going to be a long year.

January 2017: 55 killed, 258 wounded
January 2016: 57 killed, 246 wounded
January 2015: 32 killed, 120 wounded
January 2014: 24 killed, 82 wounded

A breakdown of the month’s idiocy shows:

  • 53 shot & killed
  • 2 stabbed
  • 2 fatal police shootings
  • All 31 days tallied at least 2+ shot
  • 4 days were homicide-free. Success!
  • 48 in serious or critical condition
  • 53 males killed vs 2 females
  • 67 teenagers shot, 9 killed
  • 19 grazed
  • 2 selfies
  • 10 #ShotInTheAss

Looking ahead, February is not only the shortest month of the year but also the quietest. Still, last February managed to put up 46 homicides with an additional 156 shot and wounded. Since the SS Shitshow seems to be stuck at full flank, we’re looking for 50 homicides (~7 St. Valentine’s Day Massacres) plus another 175 shot and wounded.

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The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Friday, January 27th, 2017

LiberaceA summer weekend overtime scenario was put in place in order to desperately keep this January from besting last January. While there was a noticeable drop in stupidity from the usual west side dumpster fires, we still tallied a slightly about average weekend for this time of year.

Final Stupidity Tally: 5 killed, 23 wounded
2016 weekend tally: 8 killed, 25 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 4 killed, 7 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 2 killed, 10 wounded

Friday 1/27
3:25p 5900 S Carpenter, Englewood, M/38
3:30p 6700 S Morgan, Englewood, M/20
4:00p 1800 S Racine, Lower West Side, M/31
6:00p 6700 S Ridgeland, South Shore, M/35
7:45p 400 W 129th, West Pullman, M/34
11:05p 7600 S Stony Island, South Shore, M/17
Saturday 1/28
12:45a 1400 S Avers, North Lawndale, M/21
1:30a 6800 S Peoria, Englewood, M/47
1:40a 1200 N Halsted, Near North Side, M/25
1:45a 5000 W 52nd, Garfield Ridge, M/27
2:50a 5600 W Grand, Belmont Cragin, M/34
3:30a 1200 N State, Near North Side, M/39 (story)
3:30a 1200 N State, Near North Side, M/33
3:30a 1200 N State, Near North Side, M/30
5:30a 2400 W Division, West Town, M/24
5:45a 3000 W 61st, Chicago Lawn, M/3
5:45a 3000 W 61st, Chicago Lawn, M/23
2:40p 2800 E 76th, South Shore, M/24
4:00p 3500 N Laramie, Portage Park, M/19
6:30p 7700 S Sangamon, Auburn Gresham, M/14
9:05p 3800 W Flournoy, Garfield Park, M/44
Sunday 1/29
1:45a 6300 S Prairie, Washington Heights, M/16
3:00p 6300 S Racine, Englewood, M/22
5:35p 6200 W Grand, Belmont Cragin, M/23
6:50p 4730 W Erie, Austin, F/51
6:50p 1900 N Pulaski, Hermosa, M/16
11:00p 3500 W 38th, Brighton Park, M/31
Monday Overtime
12:35a 8500 S Colfax, South Chicago, M/55

Key:
shooting
homicide
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday

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Happy Anniversary

Posted on Wednesday, January 25th, 2017

Three StoogesIt was on this date four years ago that we launched an idea based on the “Chicago values” we were told so much about during that violent, Chick-fil-A chicken sammich-infused summer of 2012. Since we were never told exactly what those values were, we assumed that it must be murder, crime and mayhem.

Since then we’ve recorded over 2,200 homicides, nearly 11,000 shot and wounded, dozens and dozens of “death investigations” along with hundreds of people who caught one in the ass.

As always, thanks to everyone who has visited, emailed, followed, linked, liked and donated helping make this idea a very minor success.

Here’s to four more years.

– The HeyJackass Crew

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The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Saturday, January 21st, 2017

1968 DNC RiotsJust your average summer weekend complete with three doubles, six hat tricks and a grand slam, in January.

Final Stupidity Tally: 8 killed, 47 wounded
2016 weekend tally: 5 killed, 20 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 5 killed, 22 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 3 killed, 14 wounded

Friday 1/20
4:15p 1400 W 49th, New City, M/30
5:40p 600 S Sacramento, Garfield Park, M/19
9:00p 5200 W Congress, Austin, M/25
9:00p 5200 W Congress, Austin, M/27
9:00p 5200 W Congress, Austin, M/22
9:20p 2900 E 91st, South Chicago, F/27
11:10p 8100 S Drexel, Chatham, M/24
Saturday 1/21
2:00a 5400 W Ohio, Austin, M/28
3:15a 3900 W Thomas, Humboldt Park, M/?
3:15a 3900 W Thomas, Humboldt Park, M/36
3:15a 3900 W Thomas, Humboldt Park, M/42
3:15a 3800 S St Louis, Brighton Park, M/22
3:15a 3800 S St Louis, Brighton Park, F/27
3:15a 3800 S St Louis, Brighton Park, M/28
3:45a 7600 S Bishop, Auburn Gresham, M/26
11:35a 100 W 69th, Grand Crossing, M/24
1:40p 2600 W Monroe, Near West Side, M/24
2:25p 4400 W Maypole, Garfield Park, M/27
4:00p 4400 W Fullerton, Hermosa, M/36
4:45p 7700 S Racine, Auburn Gresham, M/47
5:00p 100 W 104th, Roseland, M/21
5:15p 1300 N Mayfield, Austin, M/18
5:15p 1300 N Mayfield, Austin, M/21
5:15p 1300 N Mayfield, Austin, M/23
7:40p 7900 S Exchange, South Chicago, F/19
8:30p 300 S California, Garfield Park, M/17
8:30p 300 S California, Garfield Park, M/22
9:10p 8000 S Woodlawn, Avalon Park, F/20
9:10p 8000 S Woodlawn, Avalon Park, M/18
9:40p 3330 W Monroe, Garfield Park, M/27
10:45p 600 N St Louis, Humboldt Park, M/26
11:15p 10 N Sacramento, Garfield Park, M/23
Sunday 1/22
12:20a 6100 N Winchester, West Ridge, M/29
2:50a 6500 W Irving Park, Dunning, M/23
3:20a 9600 S Peoria, Washington Heights, M/28
3:40a 500 S Central, Austin, M/27
4:00a 3200 E 91st, South Chicago, M/26
4:25a 700 N Hamlin, Humboldt Park, M/15
4:25a 700 N Hamlin, Humboldt Park, M/17
6:30a 3500 S Rhodes, Douglas, M/22
6:30a 3500 S Rhodes, Douglas, F/23
6:30a 3500 S Rhodes, Douglas, M/24
8:50a 1500 W Huron, West Town, M/25
8:50a 1500 W Huron, West Town, M/26
8:50a 1500 W Huron, West Town, M/30
11:00a 1100 N Lockwood, Austin, M/27
12:15p 1800 W 63rd, Englewood, M/26
12:15p 1800 W 63rd, Englewood, M/26
12:15p 1800 W 63rd, Englewood, F/56
12:15p 1800 W 63rd, Englewood, F/48
9:25p 2800 S Hillcock, Bridgeport, M/16
10:45p 4200 W Iowa, Humboldt Park, M/18
Monday Overtime
12:30a 3600 N Central, Portage Park, M/22
1:25a 2000 W Diversey, North Center, M/24
1:55a 5000 W Maypole, Austin, F/?

Key:
shooting
homicide
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday
Photo borrowed from Time Magazine

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“Another defeat…”

Posted on Thursday, January 19th, 2017

Self Defense ZoneWe’re quickly approaching the bonus level of self parody with the city not able to pass a constitutional law regarding firearms without it being struck down at first defense.

“The U.S. Court of Appeals handed Chicago another defeat in its effort to restrict the operation of gun ranges in the city.

The appeals court on Wednesday ruled that city ordinances restricting gun ranges to manufacturing areas in Chicago are unconstitutional. The ordinances also placed limits on the distances they can be located in relation to other gun ranges and to residential areas, schools, parks and places of worship.

A three-judge panel of the Seventh Circuit Court of Appeals noted the city claimed the ordinances serve important public health and safety interests, specifically that they attract gun thieves, cause airborne lead contamination and carry a risk of fire.

“The city has provided no evidentiary support for these claims, nor has it established that limiting shooting ranges to manufacturing districts and distancing them from the multiple and various uses listed in the buffer-zone rule has any connection to reducing these risks,” the court wrote in its opinion.”

Besides, who needs those costly gun ranges and their boring paper targets. Numerous street corners, alleys, porches, avenues, boulevards and/or neighborhoods are free fire ranges with live, moving targets all with no cost or penalty for the user.

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The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Sunday, January 15th, 2017

Nothing to See Here Folks... Naked GunAs is usually the case whenever there is a quiet period, last weekend, the following period, this weekend, more than makes up for it.

Final Stupidity Tally: 10 killed, 24 wounded
2016 weekend tally: 4 killed, 27 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 4 killed, 14 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 4 killed, 13 wounded

Friday the 13th
4:00p 600 N Central, Austin, M/21
5:15p 4000 W Madison, Garfield Park, M/19
9:50p 7200 S Washtenaw, Chicago Lawn, M/20
11:30p 10500 S Sangamon, Washington Heights, M/28
11:40p 2300 S Kedzie, Little Village, M/21
Saturday 1/14
12:30a 4000 W Ogden, North Lawndale, M/17
3:30a 6000 S Carpenter, Englewood, M/25
3:30a 6000 S Carpenter, Englewood, F/26
8:05a 1100 S Francisco, North Lawndale, M/27
8:05a 1100 S Francisco, North Lawndale, M/39
9:50a 1500 S Hamlin, North Lawndale, M/18
11:45a 1900 W 70th, Englewood, M/16
1:30p 100 S Kilpatrick, Austin, M/25
5:05p 200 N Kostner, Garfield Park, M/23
5:05p 400 S Central, Austin, M/18
6:55p 5500 W Rice, Austin, M/26

8:50p 4900 W Hubbard, Austin, M/22
Sunday 1/15
12:25a 3400 W Madison, Garfield Park, M/34 (story)
12:25a 3400 W Madison, Garfield Park, F/51
12:25a 3400 W Madison, Garfield Park, M/30
12:25a 3400 W Madison, Garfield Park, F/21
1:15a 4700 W Polk, Austin, M/34
3:50a 1400 N Rockwell, West Town, M/25
5:05a 7300 S Union, Englewood, M/25
5:30a 2600 W Van Buren, Garfield Park, M/?
2:25p 4600 S Marshfield, New City, M/31
2:25p 4600 S Marshfield, New City, M/60
2:45p 6300 S Cottage Grove, Woodlawn, M/16
7:30p 4500 N Kedzie, Albany Park, M/22 (story)
8:00p 600 W 95th, Washington Heights, F/36
8:10p 600 N Leclaire, Austin, M/33
Monday Overtime
12:25a 6900 S Normal, Englewood, M/28
1:10a 2200 W Chicago, West Town, M/36
1:45a 7500 S Wentworth, Grand Crossing, M/28

Key:
shooting
homicide
police involved
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday

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Flip to ’17

Posted on Thursday, January 12th, 2017

Face PlantGiven how 2016 ended up being the most nonsensical year in a couple of decades, we’ve decided to let the year’s stupidity hang around for a bit longer than years prior. As 2016 basks in all its morbid glory, 2017 has been working behind the scenes and tallying similar counts to its older sibling. While all bad things must come to an end, we’ll look to retire 2016 and start rolling out the new stats and charts over the weekend.

UPDATE: For those of you looking for the Weekend’s Stupidity, as of 12:00a the tally stands at 5 killed, 12 wounded. We’ll post the usual rundown after we’re finished rolling over to 2017.

UPDATE 2: Flip complete. As always, we’ll be posting additional stats and graphics over the coming weeks and months as the stupidity accumulates.

Thanks for your patience and continued support.

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The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Saturday, January 7th, 2017

HomerWhat was likely the coldest weekend of the winter shooting season, we were expecting a quiet one for a change and we did. This weekend was the quietest since early March.

Final Stupidity Tally: 2 killed, 10 wounded
2016 weekend tally: 7 killed, 32 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 2 killed, 14 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 2 killed, 8 wounded

Friday 1/6
1:40p 3800 W Adams, Garfield Park, M/19
1:40p 3800 W Adams, Garfield Park, M/20
1:40p 3800 W Adams, Garfield Park, M/26
5:30p 4800 S Wolcott, New City, M/23
11:10p 3900 W Grenshaw, North Lawndale, M/23
Saturday 1/7
10:00a 1300 W Hasting, Near West Side, M/30
2:45p 10300 S Western, Beverly, M/25
9:25p 5300 S Maryland, Hyde Park, M/17
11:00p 800 S California, Garfield Park, M/24
Sunday 1/8
12:00a 4900 W Roscoe, Portage Park, M/33
1:40a 5600 N Western, West Ridge, M/21
9:40p 5400 S Laflin, New City, M/21

Key:
shooting
homicide
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday

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Year In Review

Posted on Wednesday, January 4th, 2017

Father TimeAround this time every year, we make a poor attempt to summarize the previous twelve months. This time around we can easily sum up the previous year with a simple phrase, massive shitshow.

Typically, we prefer to reserve usage of this phrase for the always shitty July 4th weekend and similar efforts. However when nearly every other weekend puts up July 4th numbers and every month posts 30, 40 or 50% gains over the same month last year, it’s the phrase that pays.

In short, summarizing the year is quite simple:

2017 isn’t looking much better than 2016. In fact, we believe it’ll be worse as the CPD will continue to stay fetal and let the Strategic Subject List(ed) jagoffs ventilate one another. 850 homicides with an additional 3850 shot and wounded very well may be the tally come December 31st, 2017.

Finally, a YUUGE thanks to you dear reader for making 2016 our best year yet. Have yourself a safe and prosperous new year.

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New Year’s Stupidity

Posted on Friday, December 30th, 2016

New Year's  DrunkWhile the 800 homicide gorilla was denied entry into 2016’s frunchroom by the time the clock struck midnight, the year’s final tally will most likely exceed the 800 level soon due to late passings, reclassified death investigations and found bodies. Have yourself a safe and prosperous new year.

Final Stupidity Tally: 9 killed, 52 wounded
2015 weekend tally*: 4 killed, 40 wounded

Friday 12/30
12:25p 4800 W Ferdinand, Austin, M/19
1:55p 8200 S Ingleside, Chatham, M/?
(ccw)
1:55p 8200 S Ingleside, Chatham, M/23
4:30p 4700 S Throop, New City, M/25
5:30p 100 N Long, Austin, M/22
7:30p 700 W 73rd, Englewood, M/33
9:50p 8100 S Bishop, Auburn Gresham, M/?
New Year’s Eve
3:05a 5600 S Albany, Gage Park, M/35
3:15a 2200 N Latrobe, Belmont Cragin, M/22
3:15a 2200 N Latrobe, Belmont Cragin, M/37
12:30p 4800 W Chicago, Austin, M/22
1:00p 5600 W Corcoran, Austin, M/15
1:55p 4000 W 21st, North Lawndale, M/32
2:00p 9300 S Wentworth, Roseland, F/52
3:50p 4400 S Marshfield, New City, M/22
3:50p 4400 S Marshfield, New City, M/27
5:30p 4300 S Wolcott, New City, M/32
6:20p 3700 S Wabash, Douglas, M/38
9:15p 7200 S Coles, South Shore, M/19
11:20p 900 N Karlov, Humboldt Park, F/21
11:20p 900 N Karlov, Humboldt Park, M/25
New Year’s Day
1:05a 5500 W Drummond, Belmont Cragin, M/19
1:05a 5500 W Drummond, Belmont Cragin, M/21
1:40a 2300 W Jackson, Near West Side, M/23
2:00a 4400 S Indiana, Grand Boulevard, M/20
2:00a 4400 S Indiana, Grand Boulevard, F/31
2:00a 4400 S Indiana, Grand Boulevard, M/33
2:15a 200 W Pershing, Armour Square, M/22
2:15a 9500 S State, Roseland, F/29
2:20a 200 W 71st, Englewood, F/26
2:30a 9200 S Parnell, Washington Heights, M/24
2:30a 12000 S State, West Pullman, M/?
3:45a 11200 S Longwood, Morgan Park, M/19
3:45a 11200 S Longwood, Morgan Park, M/20
3:45a 11200 S Longwood, Morgan Park, M/21
3:55a 200 W 63rd, Englewood, M/26
4:30a 4600 N Broadway, Uptown, M/31
4:30a 4600 N Broadway, Uptown, M/38
(story)
5:30a 4800 S Racine, New City, M/52
5:55a 4600 W Monroe, Austin, M/39
11:15a 5100 W North, Austin, M/27
12:05p 9900 S Halsted, Washington Heights, M/15
1:40p 5300 S Fairfield, Gage Park, M/17
2:35p 6700 S Indiana, Grand Crossing, M/19
3:50p 13000 S Indiana, West Pullman, M/31
7:30p 100 N Wolcott, Near West Side, M/16
9:40p 4122 W 15th, North Lawndale, F/48
10:55p 5100 W Madison, Austin, M/26
10:55p 5100 W Madison, Austin, M/31
10:55p 5100 W Madison, Austin, M/19
New Year’s Day Observed
1:40a 2500 W 55th, Gage Park, F/21
1:40a 2500 W 55th, Gage Park, M/26
9:15a 2500 N Lowell, Hermosa, M/39 (story)
9:30a 300 S Homan, Garfield Park, M/20
3:15p 1700 N Lorel, Austin, M/24
4:00p 5100 W Hirsch, Austin, M/21
4:35p 3700 W 13th, North Lawndale, M/16
9:35p 2100 W 64th, Englewood, M/22
10:20p 7000 S Harper, South Shore, M/25
10:25p 4400 S Ogden, North Lawndale, M/32
Tuesday Overtime
12:25a 1700 N Lorel, Austin, M/15

Key:
shooting
homicide
police involved
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Tuesday
*Weekend = 12p Thursday – 6a Monday

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Christmas Stupidity

Posted on Friday, December 23rd, 2016

Cousin EddieApparently old St. Nick filled some stockings with .22, 9mm and .40 resulting in a Memorial Day-July 4th-Labor Day-summer-weekends-like body count. Merry Christmas.

Final Stupidity Tally: 12 killed, 51 wounded
Christmas Weekend 2015: 13 killed, 23 wounded

Friday 12/23
1:25p 8700 S Sangamon, Auburn Gresham, M/18
1:25p 8700 S Sangamon, Auburn Gresham, M/23
3:30p 4900 W Kinzie, Austin, M/16
4:50p 4900 W Hubbard, Austin, M/16
4:50p 4900 W Hubbard, Austin, M/16
4:50p 4900 W Hubbard, Austin, M/16
4:50p 4900 W Hubbard, Austin, M/18
6:35p 500 W Iowa, Near North Side, M/44
10:25p 2000 N Kedvale, Hermosa, M/52
10:50p 500 N Laramie, Austin, M/20
10:50p 500 N Laramie, Austin, M/21

Christmas Eve
12:05a 3000 W 38th, Brighton Park, M/27
1:15a 3400 W Beach, Humboldt Park, M/26
1:15a 3400 W Beach, Humboldt Park, M/34
1:20a 10800 S Wentworth, Roseland, M/17
2:40a 4600 S Leamington, Garfield Ridge, M/41
4:30a 5900 S Western, Chicago Lawn, M/23
4:50a 5700 S Prairie, Washington Park, M/26
9:25a 4300 S Marshfield, New City, M/24
3:30p 2000 W 68th, Englewood, M/25
4:15p 6700 S Hermitage, Englewood, M/35
6:10p 8600 S Morgan, Auburn Gresham, F/22
6:35p 1800 S Central Park, North Lawndale, F/17
6:35p 1800 S Central Park, North Lawndale, M/20
7:15p 7300 S Michigan, Grand Crossing, M/53
7:55p 8800 S Wallace, Auburn Gresham, M/28
8:15p 500 W Chestnut, Near North Side, M/25
8:55p 8900 S Hermitage, Auburn Gresham, M/20
Christmas
12:50a 2600 E 76th, South Shore, M/21
1:35a 5300 S Francisco, Gage Park, M/18
9:50a 1100 W 112th, Morgan Park, M/24

10:40a 3800 W Roosevelt, North Lawndale, F/27
10:40a 3800 W Roosevelt, North Lawndale, M/29
1:40p 800 N Kostner, Humboldt Park, M/22
2:45p 7100 S Seeley, Englewood, M/21
4:30p 2800 E 79th, South Shore, M/40
9:20p 8649 S Maryland, Chatham, M/18
9:20p 8649 S Maryland, Chatham, M/21

9:20p 8649 S Maryland, Chatham, M/?
9:20p 8649 S Maryland, Chatham, F/21
9:20p 8649 S Maryland, Chatham, M/27
9:20p 8649 S Maryland, Chatham, M/35
9:20p 8649 S Maryland, Chatham, M/39
11:30p 7400 S Chappel, South Shore, M/22
Boxing Day
3:50a 2700 W Adams, Garfield Park, M/31
3:50a 4100 N Kedvale, Irving Park, F/26
9:25a 300 S Kostner, Garfield Park, M/?
9:30a 7100 S Indiana, Grand Crossing, M/25
9:30a 7100 S Indiana, Grand Crossing, M/26
10:40a 400 W Marquette, Englewood, M/24
11:20a 1800 S Ridgeway, North Lawndale, M/?
2:45p 7900 S Cottage Grove, Chatham, M/22
3:25p 5800 S May, Englewood, M/20
3:25p 5800 S May, Englewood, M/35
4:25p 4100 W Arthington, Garfield Park, M/45
5:40p 4800 S Bishop, New City, M/34
5:50p 4400 S Hermitage, New City, M/23
7:25p 6700 S Wolcott, Englewood, M/18
8:55p 800 N Keeler, Humboldt Park, M/23
10:50p 200 S Leavitt, Near West Side, M/23
11:30p 7500 S Union, Englewood, F/13
11:30p 7500 S Union, Englewood, F/14
Tuesday Overtime
12:50a 3500 W Van Buren, Garfield Park, F/25

Key:
shooting
homicide
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Tuesday

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Party On

Posted on Tuesday, December 20th, 2016

Maybe City Hall should stick to taking down street signs given their moronic belief that some “regulations” would prevent violent drug-and-booze-infused assholes from being violent drug-and-booze-infused assholes.

A recently enacted Chicago ordinance targeted nuisance party buses, requiring drivers to call police if inebriated patrons chuck a beer bottle out the window, flash unsuspecting bystanders or smoke marijuana.

But this weekend’s shooting aboard a party bus that left three people hurt in Lakeview — the sixth shooting with injuries in 14 months involving the entertainment vehicles — points to a contradiction in the rules with more violent consequences.

Illinois’ concealed carry law stops patrons from bringing firearms into a bar or restaurant that predominantly sells alcohol, but those restrictions don’t apply on a party bus, where passengers supply their own booze. Gun policy experts called party buses a gray area in the law that hasn’t explicitly been addressed. Though many bus companies ban customers from packing on board, little enforcement takes place, according to owners.

Ald. Brendan Reilly, 42nd, who proposed the party bus ordinance, said it’s “incredibly frustrating” that problems persist even after the new regulations kicked in. The city ordinance approved Sept. 14 is silent on the issue of whether passengers can bring a gun on board, but states the driver must call police if a weapon is discharged.

It’s also “incredibly frustrating” that slayings, shootings, robberies, beatings, rapes, burglaries and general stupidity persist even after those regulations kicked in a few millennia ago.

Also, what does Illinois’ concealed carry law have to do with all of this? Nothing. It has played about as much of a part of these party bus incidents as the Russians.

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The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Friday, December 16th, 2016

Chicago: Iced over parked carOfficer Winter arrived late for his weekend shift thereby letting the usual nonsense run at a summer-like clip which included four incidents leaving three or more with additional ventilation.

Final Stupidity Tally: 9 killed, 31 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 4 killed, 26 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 4 killed, 29 wounded

Friday 12/16
12:55p 3500 W Ainslie, Albany Park, M/?
3:30p 4300 S Rockwell, Brighton Park, M/17
3:30p 4300 S Rockwell, Brighton Park, M/47

3:30p 4300 S Rockwell, Brighton Park, M/17
3:30p 4300 S Rockwell, Brighton Park, M/18
4:00p 1300 S Kedzie, North Lawndale, M/18
4:00p 1300 S Kedzie, North Lawndale, M/18
4:00p 1300 S Kedzie, North Lawndale, M/25
4:00p 1300 S Kedzie, North Lawndale, M/?
4:30p 10600 S Halsted, Washington Heights, M/27
6:10p 4500 S Wood, New City, M/19
8:40p 5100 S Long, Garfield Ridge, M/52
10:40p 3700 N Harlem, Dunning, M/28

10:55p 4700 S Wolcott, New City, M/18
11:30p 1300 N Lawndale, Humboldt Park, M/23
Saturday 12/17
1:15a 3500 W Roosevelt, North Lawndale, M/16
2:50a 4300 W Haddon, Humboldt Park, M/44
4:30a I290 & Ashland, Near West Side, M/?
12:20p 3100 W Roosevelt, North Lawndale, M/21
12:40p 100 E 105th, Roseland, F/19 (story)
12:40p 100 E 105th, Roseland, F/41
12:40p 100 E 105th, Roseland, M/36
12:40p 100 E 105th, Roseland, M/45

12:40p 100 E 105th, Roseland, F/18
4:25p 5900 W Rice, Austin, M/9 (selfie)
5:05p 4500 S Princeton, Fuller Park, M/15
6:25p 100 S Leamington, Austin, M/32
6:35p 8800 S Burley, South Chicago, M/26
7:00p 11500 S Princeton, West Pullman, M/28
7:00p 8200 S Ingleside, Chatham, M/17
Sunday 12/18
12:50a 3100 W Irving Park, Irving Park, M/34
12:50a 8500 S Kingston, South Chicago, M/22
12:50a 8500 S Kingston, South Chicago, F/26
1:45a 1700 W Lunt, Rogers Park, M/32
1:55a 500 W Irving Park, Lake View, M/38 (story)
1:55a 500 W Irving Park, Lake View, M/33
1:55a 500 W Irving Park, Lake View, M/31
(selfie)
3:30p 1500 W 17th, Lower W Side, M/17
4:00p 1700 W 75th, Auburn Gresham, M/24
♫ ♫ Baby it’s cold outside ♫ ♫
Monday Overtime
12:20a 7800 S Ingleside, Grand Crossing, M/26 (selfie)

Key:
shooting
homicide
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday

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Winter Blast

Posted on Tuesday, December 13th, 2016

Typical Chicago WinterOfficer Winter will continue his shift likely saving Rahm from an 800 tally in the red column.

CHICAGO — Wednesday and Thursday may feel as cold as 25 below zero thanks to an early winter blast that’ll make for the coldest December in years.

In addition to the usual injuries associated with gunfire, frigid temps may put gangbangers at risk of frostbite, warned Weatherbug meteorologist James Westerbrook.

“If that 9mm or .40 slug doesn’t get you, it’ll be the cold,” Westerbrook said. “Anybody that’s going to be outdoors looking to shoot someone Wednesday night or Thursday, must bundle up. Ideally, you’ll want to take aim from a heated vehicle or indoors during an overcrowded house party.” Westerbrook further suggests gangbangers wear gloves with the trigger finger missing so as not to further degrade their already horrible aim.

“Friday we’ll see temperatures rise a bit, which will make for better shooting conditions, however with snow in the forecast they may just have to stop killing one another for a few days” Westerbrook said. “There will plenty of time to kill your rival gang member between Christmas and New Years,” when the temperatures are expected to be more seasonal and favorable to violence.

“You rival isn’t going to be jetting off to Disney World or Hawaii during this cold snap,” Westerbrook continued. “Save yourself from frostbite and wait for warmer weather to kill him or saddle him with that colostomy bag for life. Your trigger finger will thank you.”

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The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Saturday, December 10th, 2016

Pre storm dibsOfficer Winter performed as expected making for the quietest weekend since early March.

Final Stupidity Tally: 3 killed, 12 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 3 killed, 34 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 3 killed, 32 wounded

Friday 12/9
3:15p 5500 W Crystal, Austin, M/19
5:30p 1100 S Francisco, North Lawndale, M/50
5:30p 1600 N Cicero, Austin, M/20
9:50p 6900 S Hermitage, Englewood, M/16
10:00p 8000 S Evans, Chatham, M/34
Saturday 12/10
3:30a 5900 S Calumet, Washington Park, M/32
6:20a 9100 S Wentworth, Roseland, M/28
12:30p 900 N Homan, Humboldt Park, M/19
❄❄ Snow Delay ❄❄
7:55p 1600 N Mason, Austin, M/25
❄❄ Snow Delay ❄❄
Sunday 12/11
1:30a 4000 W Polk, Garfield Park, M/20
1:35a 600 W 129th, West Pullman, M/20
12:05p 300 E 136th, Riverdale, M/45
2:40p 1300 S Millard, North Lawndale, M/16
❄❄ Snow Delay ❄❄
7:00p 6600 S Stony Island, Woodlawn, F/18
7:00p 6600 S Stony Island, Woodlawn, M/23

Key:
shooting
homicide
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday

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Parts is Parts

Posted on Wednesday, December 7th, 2016

Wendy's Parts is parts commercialChicago has always accepted a certain level of violence from the gangsters of the 20’s and 30’s through to the jagoffs of today. It’s only when the level of violence gets to a point where people start to notice does it become a parts problem.

“Chicago’s top cop says he’s personally upset by public perception that the city is overrun by murder and other violence, even as a deadly November pushed homicides overall here to the highest level in nearly two decades.

“The truth of the matter is Chicago is not out of control. There’s certain parts of the city that we have to address the violence,” Chicago police Superintendent Eddie Johnson said Tuesday at a downtown City Club of Chicago breakfast. He and Cook County Sheriff Tom Dart told the room full of civic leaders and others gathered at Maggiano’s restaurant that they continue to push for new legislation to toughen penalties for repeat gun offenders.”

We actually agree with Ed. Certain parts are very much out of control whereas other parts are not. However, parts are neither in or out of control, it’s the individuals who occupy those parts that are out of control. Parts is parts.

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The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Saturday, December 3rd, 2016

Anti-lunatic SquadEven a lengthy snow delay on Sunday did little to slowdown the stupidity. Four triples and three doubles added to the tally faster than a Wrigleyville bro can blackout after a Cubs game.

Final Stupidity Tally: 7 killed, 28 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 4 killed, 22 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 3 killed, 25 wounded

Friday 12/2
3:00p 5400 S Cornell, Hyde Park, M/33
6:15p 1500 S Kedzie, North Lawndale, M/16

8:30p 8158 S Halsted, Auburn Gresham, M/?
8:30p 700 N Leamington , Austin, M/22
8:35p 1350 S Harding, North Lawndale, M/33
10:20p 10900 S Wentworth, Roseland, M/19
Saturday 12/3
1:10a 3200 W Warren, Garfield Park, F/19
1:10a 3200 W Warren, Garfield Park, M/25 (story)
1:45a 4000 S Albany, Brighton Park, M/25
2:00a 5300 S Archer, Garfield Ridge, M/40
2:50a 10 West Elm, Near North Side, M/21
2:50a 10 West Elm, Near North Side, M/23
2:50a 10 West Elm, Near North Side, M/28
7:25a 2000 E 71st, South Shore, F/60
1:00p 6400 S Peoria, Englewood, M/23
2:00p 7100 S Ingleside, Grand Crossing, M/18
2:30p 6500 S Talman, Chicago Lawn, M/32
4:20p 2300 S Harding, Little Village, M/27
11:30p 4000 W Cortland, Hermosa, M/17
11:30p 4000 W Cortland, Hermosa, M/18
11:40p 5500 W Higgins, Jefferson Park, M/41
Sunday 12/4
2:00a 7300 S Yale, Grand Crossing, M/22
3:10a 6500 S King, Grand Crossing, M/23

3:10a 6500 S King, Grand Crossing, M/24
3:10a 6500 S King, Grand Crossing, M/?
3:30a 1200 S Avers, North Lawndale, M/29
❄❄ Snow Delay ❄❄
2:30p 200 S California, Garfield Park, M/23
2:30p 200 S California, Garfield Park, M/23
❄❄ Snow Delay ❄❄
9:05p 300 S Campbell, Near West Side, M/22
9:05p 300 S Campbell, Near West Side, M/24
9:05p 300 S Campbell, Near West Side, M/25
10:40p 3400 W Augusta, Humboldt Park, M/?
10:40p 3400 W Augusta, Humboldt Park, M/31
10:40p 3400 W Augusta, Humboldt Park, M/40
11:45p 8100 S Ellis, Chatham, M/42

Key:
shooting
homicide
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday

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November Wrap-up

Posted on Thursday, December 1st, 2016

CarnacWhat a shitshow, again. We’ve been looking for the stupidity to take a breather, grab some bench and generally just slow down a bit. Instead, November acted like a teenager plowing through a closed garage door in reverse and tallying more homicides than June or July.

Final Stupidity Tally: 81 killed, 324 wounded
November 2015: 37 dead, 165 wounded
November 2014: 38 dead, 125 wounded

A breakdown of the month’s idiocy shows:

  • 76 shot & killed
  • 5 killed via other means
  • 4 fatal police shootings
  • 2 days were homicide-free. Success!
  • 64 in serious or critical condition
  • 77 males killed vs 4 females
  • 101 teenagers shot, 18 killed
  • 22 grazed
  • 4 selfies
  • 16 #ShotInTheAss

Looking ahead, December is usually worse than both October and November as the usual jagoffs look to fill their quota before the year ends. Last December put up 39 homicides with an additional 213 shot and wounded. Keeping with the current trend, we’re looking for 80 homicides plus another 350 shot and wounded with the bed-shitting 800th homicide being tallied around Christmas.

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Self Defense, Again

Posted on Wednesday, November 30th, 2016

Self Defense ZoneWhile police shootings grab all the headlines and gangbangers continue to ventilate one another with reckless abandon, average joes go mostly unnoticed when they protect their lives and property:

“Three men have been charged after two of them were shot by the employee of the store they tried to rob Sunday night in West Rogers Park, according to Chicago Police.

Stephon Kinchen, 18; Anthony Simpkins-McDonald, 21; and Neil Thomas, 24, each face two felony counts of attempted robbery armed with a firearm, police said.

About 9:45 p.m., they tried to hold up the store in the 7400 block of North Western when a male employee with a valid concealed carry license opened fire, hitting two of them before they ran away, police said. They were arrested nearby.

Thomas shot in the shoulder and treated at Illinois Masonic Medical Center, and Kinchen was taken to Swedish Covenant Hospital with a graze wound to the forearm. Their conditions were stabilized, police said. Simpkins-McDonald was not injured. “

Given Cook County’s lenient justice system, we’re confident another average Joe or fellow jagoff will take a shot at this trio in < 2 years.

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Thanksgiving Stupidity

Posted on Friday, November 25th, 2016

3 Stooges ThanksgivingWe now join our special, extended Thanksgiving Weekend Stupidity already in progress.

Final Stupidity Tally: 11 killed, 64 wounded
2015 Thanksgiving weekend: 9 killed, 22 wounded
2014 Thanksgiving weekend: 5 killed, 23 wounded
2013 Thanksgiving weekend: 4 killed, 12 wounded

Wednesday 11/23
12:30p 3300 W North, Humboldt Park, M/70
3:10p 10700 S Green Bay, East Side, M/29
7:00p 2700 W Maypole, Garfield Park, M/20
7:00p 5500 W Quincy, Austin, M/19
10:30p 200 S Klipatrick, Austin, M/23
10:30p 200 S Klipatrick, Austin, M/25
11:05p 1400 W 65th, Englewood, M/19 (story)
Thanksgiving
12:05a 1400 N Massasoit, Austin, M/16
2:10a 2200 N Springfield, Logan Square, F/22
3:20a 5300 N Paulina, Edgewater, M/56
4:30a Uncooperative hospital walk-in, M/39
1:50p 400 N St. Louis, Humboldt Park, M/38
3:40p 3900 W Roosevelt, North Lawndale, M/19
5:30p 8100 S King, Chatham, M/24
8:40p 4900 W Wrightwood, Belmont Cragin, M/17
8:40p 4900 W Wrightwood, Belmont Cragin, M/20
10:00p 12300 S Michigan, West Pullman, M/23
11:40p 1600 N Latrobe, Austin, M/32
11:40p 1600 N Latrobe, Austin, M/35
#000000 Friday
12:25a 600 S Central Park, Garfield Park, M/? (story)
12:25a 600 S Central Park, Garfield Park, M/?
12:25a 600 S Central Park, Garfield Park, M/?
1:00a 200 W 109th, Roseland, M/24
7:40a 200 W 121st, West Pullman, M/26
1:50p 7300 S Lowe, Englewood, M/24
4:30p 4000 S Dearborn, Grand Boulevard, M/18
6:40p 4800 S Throop, New City, M/16
11:20p 8800 S Escanaba, South Chicago, M/18
Saturday 11/25
12:40a 7500 N Damen, Rogers Park, M/21
1:20a 3800 W Palmer, Logan Square, M/23
2:10a 8800 S Exchange, South Chicago, M/20
2:10a 8800 S Exchange, South Chicago, M/20
2:10a 8800 S Exchange, South Chicago, M/21
2:10a 8800 S Exchange, South Chicago, M/22
2:10a 8800 S Exchange, South Chicago, M/23
2:10a 8800 S Exchange, South Chicago, F/25
2:40a ??? S Independence, North Lawndale, M/27
3:25a 3300 W Madison, Garfield Park, M/22
6:10a 1600 E 92nd, Calumet Heights, M/48
12:00p 6800 S State, Grand Crossing, M/23 (selfie)
3:40p 6600 S Kenwood, Woodlawn, M/56
5:00p 7900 S Escanaba, South Chicago, M/17
6:20p 7000 S Emerald, Englewood, M/19
6:20p 7000 S Emerald, Englewood, M/20
6:20p 7000 S Emerald, Englewood, M/29
6:25p 7200 S Sangamon, Englewood, M/29
10:15p 4700 S Western, New City, M/32
10:15p 4300 S Richmond, Brighton Park, M/20
10:20p 11700 S Justine, West Pullman, M/15
Sunday 11/26
12:45a 4500 W Congress, Garfield Park, M/15 (selfie)
1:00a 3500 W 30th, Little Village, M/26
2:40a 3400 W Harrison, Garfield Park, M/30
2:40a 3400 W Harrison, Garfield Park, M/31
3:30a 4700 S Loomis, New City, M/27
5:10a 2700 N Ridgeway, Logan Square, M/21
6:05a 600 N Clark, Near North Side, M/32
1:30p 2000 W 69th, Englewood, M/23
1:50p 3828 W Adams, Garfield Park, M/37
2:00p 3800 W Division, Humboldt Park, M/27
2:00p 8809 S Marshfield, Auburn Gresham, M/18
2:55p 1800 S Pulaski, North Lawndale, M/24
4:45p 4800 N Sheridan, Uptown, M/22
5:20p 7800 S Wood, Auburn Gresham, M/50
7:35p 500 E 38th, Douglas, M/33
9:45p 7400 N Western, West Ridge, M/18 (ccw)
9:45p 7400 N Western, West Ridge, M/20 (ccw)
10:20 6500 S King, Grand Crossing, M/20
10:55p 6500 S King, Grand Crossing, M/20
11:05p 800 W 51st, New City, F/44
11:30p 4600 W Adams, Austin, F/24
11:30p 4600 W Adams, Austin, M/? (story)
11:30p 4600 W Adams, Austin, M/? (audio)
Monday Overtime
12:40a 6100 N Maplewood, West Ridge, F/23
12:40a 6100 N Maplewood, West Ridge, F/28
3:10a 7200 S King, Grand Crossing, M/24

Key:
shooting
homicide
police involved
Weekend = 12p Wednesday – 6a Monday

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Turkey (Down)Time

Posted on Tuesday, November 22nd, 2016

Turkey TimeAs we rocket towards 4,000 involuntary projectile intercepting ventilations, we’re going to take a few days off. There will be minimal updates until we return on Friday after fist fighting our way to scoring the always coveted $25 Chinesium portable DVD player from Wal-mart. Have yourself an enjoyable Thanksgiving.

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The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Friday, November 18th, 2016

Safe Space: South ParkThe first below freezing temps of the season should provide a safe and secure sanctuary for all this weekend, except for the following who may have accidentally interrupted a projectile’s flight path.

Final Stupidity Tally: 10 killed, 20 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 6 killed, 13 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 3 killed, 15 wounded

Friday 11/18
4:45p 7800 S Kingston, South Shore, M/31
6:45p 5600 S Princeton, Englewood, M/15 (story)
7:00p 500 N Michigan, Near North Side, M/61 (selfie)
9:50p 11000 S Bishop, Morgan Park, M/28
10:15p 5000 W Wabansia, Austin, F/17
10:15p 5000 W Wabansia, Austin, F/18
10:15p 5000 W Wabansia, Austin, M/21
10:15p 5000 W Wabansia, Austin, M/21
11:50p 5200 W Addison, Portage Park, M/27
11:50p 6900 S Damen, Englewood, M/26(story)
11:50p 6900 S Damen, Englewood, M/26
Saturday 11/19
12:20a 3500 W 57th, Gage Park, M/27
12:40a 6300 S Ashland, Englewood, M/49
9:15a 6700 S Morgan, Englewood, M/22
11:55a 1400 N Latrobe, Austin, M/18

11:55a 1400 N Latrobe, Austin, M/13
2:20p 1300 S Fairfield, North Lawndale, M/24
3:50p 3300 W Maypole, Garfield Park, M/25
4:00p 5500 W Iowa, Austin, M/20
10:45p 1700 N Mason, Austin, M/25
11:00p 4500 S Honore, New City, M/20
Sunday 11/20
12:50a 6400 S Oakley, Chicago Lawn, M/22
3:00a 1300 N Moorman, West Town, M/24
3:20a 7800 S Michigan, Grand Crossing, M/40
4:30a 2400 W Devon, West Ridge, M/28

2:25p 2500 W Lithuanian Plaza, Chicago Lawn, M/20
5:00p 10300 S Avenue M, East Side, M/31
8:15p 8700 S Emerald, Auburn Gresham, M/23
8:20p 100 E 111th, Roseland, M/29
8:40p 2100 S Wolcott, Lower W Side, M/20

Key:
shooting
homicide
police involved
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday

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Sanctuary

Posted on Wednesday, November 16th, 2016

Playpensanctuary [sangk-choo-er-ee] – a sacred or holy place; a church or other sacred place where fugitives were formerly entitled to immunity from arrest. According to that definition, Chicago is neither a church nor a sacred place, yet to somehow gives holier-than-thou coverage for our betters.

Mayor Rahm Emanuel on Monday promised to protect immigrants from deportation, even as president-elect Donald Trump has pledged to remove as many as 3 million immigrants who have criminal records and are living in the country illegally.

For more than three decades, Chicago has been a sanctuary city, where local laws prohibit government workers and police officers from asking about residents’ immigration status. The mayor said that tradition would continue.

“To all those who are, after Tuesday’s election, very nervous and filled with anxiety as we’ve spoken to, you are safe in Chicago, you are secure in Chicago and you are supported in Chicago,” Emanuel said. “Chicago will always be a sanctuary city.”

Nonsense. For starters, as evidenced by various illustrations on this page, a number of the neighborhoods favored by deportables are anything other than what the average person would consider “safe”. What we’re seeing here is nothing more than a vote buying scheme since the mayor lost 1/3rd of the city when the McDonald tape went public. Plus the drug trade is a very profitable enterprise for many in these neighborhoods, immigrant or not.

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The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Saturday, November 12th, 2016

LBJ and Old Man Daley

Final Stupidity Tally: 5 killed, 32 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 1 killed, 20 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 5 killed, 16 wounded

Friday 11/11
10:10p 8700 S Elizabeth, Auburn Gresham, M/23
11:00p 5700 S Kilbourn, West Elsdon, M/23
Saturday 11/12
2:00a 6800 S Springfield, West Lawn, M/31
3:00a 12400 S Normal, West Pullman, F/20
3:00a 12400 S Normal, West Pullman, M/26
3:20a 3000 W Division, West Town, M/20
3:20a 100 S California, Garfield Park, M/?
8:00a 4400 W Monroe, Garfield Park, M/18
8:00a 4400 W Monroe, Garfield Park, M/21
8:35a 8300 S Colfax, South Chicago, M/26
1:30p 6300 S Artesian, Chicago Lawn, M/20
4:30p 900 W 116th, West Pullman, M/19
4:35p 1800 S Komensky, North Lawndale, M/24
4:40p 300 W 103rd, Roseland, M/42
6:00p 5600 S May, Englewood, M/48
7:15p 4800 W Harrison, Austin, M/19
9:10p 8700 S Racine, Auburn Gresham, F/17
10:20p 2600 W 63rd, Chicago Lawn, M/35
Sunday 11/13
12:40a 100 E 100th, Roseland, M/26
2:00a 4800 W Madison, Austin, M/?
2:10a 1600 N Richmond, West Town, M/24
2:15a 2400 S Wallace, Bridgeport, M/32
3:00a 200 N Kenneth, Garfield Park, M/29
4:00a 8300 S Green, Auburn Gresham, M/28
5:35a 5300 S Calumet, Washington Park, M/36
3:00p 5000 W Chicago, Austin, M/24
3:55p 3300 W Warren, Garfield Park, M/34
4:10p 3300 S Leavitt, Mckinley Park, M/18
5:40p 6300 S King, Grand Crossing, M/17
5:40p 6300 S King, Grand Crossing, M/19
7:20p 7200 S Phillips, South Shore, M/25
7:40p 7000 S Emerald, Englewood, M/19
9:30p 3900 W Cermak, North Lawndale, M/58
9:50p 1100 E 48th, Kenwood, M/38
10:20p 5200 S Troy, Gage Park, M/21
11:50p 7300 S Stewart, Englewood, M/46
Monday Overtime
3:40a 2500 W 47th, Brighton Park, M/26

Key:
shooting
homicide
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday

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Oops

Posted on Thursday, November 10th, 2016

Self Defense ZoneGenerally speaking, people aren’t a fan of others taking their stuff, especially at gunpoint.

“A man trying to rob a store in Auburn Gresham was shot by a security guard Wednesday night, police said.

At 7:56 p.m., a store in the 8100 block of South Racine Avenue was closing when the 18-year-old man walked up, took out a gun and said he was robbing the store, police said.

A security guard fired shots at the man, hitting the man, police said. The man was taken to Advocate Christ Medical Center in critical condition.”

No word yet on the offender’s GPA or chosen Ivy League university.

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The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Friday, November 4th, 2016

Cubs player signs ball for Capone's kid. One of the incidents below will see protests (and counter-protests), but as for the other 58, well… not so much.

Final Stupidity Tally: 14 killed, 45 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 4 killed, 20 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 8 killed, 13 wounded

Friday 11/4
12:30p I290 & Western, Near West Side, M/?
12:55p 300 S Maplewood, Near West Side, M/18
1:45p 8900 S Parnell, Auburn Gresham, M/28
2:05p 9500 S Jeffery, South Deering, M/16
Cubs Parade Recap
3:40p 6600 S Damen, Englewood, M/25
3:45p 5000 W Division, Austin, M/26
5:00p 4700 W Congress, Austin, M/?
5:45p 5000 W Division, Austin, M/26
7:15p 7000 S Eberhart, Grand Crossing, M/17
8:55p 1500 W 115th, West Pullman, M/19
9:20p 3300 W Lake, Garfield Park, M/41
10:00p 100 W 111th, Roseland, M/19
10:00p 300 N Austin, Austin, M/46
10:00p 1000 N Lorel, Austin, M/17
10:00p 1000 N Lorel, Austin, M/17
11:00p 100 E 75th, Grand Crossing, M/18
11:50p 100 S Keeler, Garfield Park, M/23
Saturday 11/5
1:05a 5900 S Winchester, Englewood, F/54
1:35a 4800 N Winthrop, Uptown, M/17
1:35a 4800 N Winthrop, Uptown, F/20
1:35a 4800 N Winthrop, Uptown, M/27
1:35a 4800 N Winthrop, Uptown, M/36
1:35a 4800 N Winthrop, Uptown, M/36
1:45a 8200 S State, Chatham, M/?
2:45a 300 N Avers, Garfield Park, F/24
3:50a 7900 S Francisco, Ashburn, M/19
3:50a 7900 S Francisco, Ashburn, F/22
2:00p 5900 N Sheridan, Edgewater, M/27
3:00p 11100 S Troy, Mt Greenwood, M/25 (story)
3:15p 7000 S Artesian, Chicago Lawn, M/19
3:40p 10100 S Halsted, Washington Heights, M/23
4:20p 2000 S Paulina, Lower W Side, M/23
4:20p 2000 S Paulina, Lower W Side, M/25
5:45p 6200 S Eberhart, Woodlawn, M/15
7:45p 5700 S Calumet, Washington Park, M/37
9:00p 8100 S Coles, South Chicago, M/55
9:20p 4800 W Washington, Austin, M/23
9:20p 4800 W Washington, Austin, M/23
9:25p 100 S Kilpatrick, Austin,M/44
10:00p 9800 S Wentworth, Roseland, M/22
11:45p 700 E 45th, Grand Boulevard, M/22

Sunday 11/6
12:30a 5600 S Kolmar, West Elsdon, M/36
2:00a 3100 S St. Louis, Little Village, M/23
2:20a 8500 S Carpenter, Auburn Gresham, M/15
2:45a 5400 S Pulaski, West Elsdon, M/36
5:00a 3300 W 47th, Brighton Park, M/23
5:00a 3300 W 47th, Brighton Park, M/30
9:20a 100 N Cicero, Austin, M/29
12:35p 2600 E 75th, South Shore, M/28
2:15p 11100 S Michigan, Roseland, M/20
2:15p 11100 S Michigan, Roseland, M/19
4:25p 4900 W West End, Austin, M/18

7:10p 7100 S Laflin, Englewood, M/78
7:20p 1700 W 18th, Lower W Side, F/32
7:55p 8800 S Wood, Auburn Gresham, F/32
8:25p 8000 S Escanaba, South Chicago, M/19
10:45p 114 W 95th, Roseland, M/30
11:00p 200 W 76th, Grand Crossing, F/20
11:20p 8300 S Cottage Grove, Chatham, M/?

Key:
shooting
homicide
police involved
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday

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Cubs Win! Cubs Win!

Posted on Thursday, November 3rd, 2016

cubs_winHell yeah! No more talk of curses, goats, 1908, 1945, lovable losers, 100-something years, Back to the Future, “wait till next year”, Steve Garvey or Steve Bartman. CUBS WIN!

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October Surprise

Posted on Wednesday, November 2nd, 2016

CarnacOctober is supposed to be a transitional month where the weather turns, street corners and porches vacate and the Cubs hit the links. Instead, this October decided to play July and act out what can only be described as a total shitshow.

Final Stupidity Tally: 80 killed, 347 wounded
October 2015: 31 dead, 203 wounded
October 2014: 39 dead, 215 wounded

A breakdown of the month’s idiocy shows:

  • 74 shot & killed
  • 6 killed via other means
  • 2 ongoing “death investigations”
  • 2 police-involved, non-fatal shootings
  • 67 in serious or critical condition
  • 72 males killed vs 7 females
  • 100 teenagers shot, 12 killed
  • 21 grazed
  • 3 selfies
  • 26 #ShotInTheAss

Looking ahead, November typically sees the pace of stupidity slow greatly, however given how this year is turning out, this month should be another doozy. Last November put up 37 homicides with an additional 165 shot and wounded. We’re looking for 65 homicides plus another 275 shot and wounded with the 700th homicide being tallied around Thanksgiving.

Bonus: If the Cubs win the World Series, we expect parts of the city to first expand into a red giant and then go nova.

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The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Saturday, October 29th, 2016

Wrigley Field 1945While a majority were paying attention to the happenings in the Wrigleyville neighborhood this weekend, elsewhere around town a recent record setting 17 weekend homicides took place. The next closest total we could track down was 16 homicides during the 2014’s July 4th weekend (which had the extra day).

Final Stupidity Tally: 17 killed, 44 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 3 killed, 28 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 4 killed, 15 wounded

Friday 10/28
12:15p 200 E 115th, Roseland, M/23
2:15p 9200 S Bishop, Washington Heights, M/21
3:40p 2000 S State, Near South Side, M/30
4:45p 6300 S Eberhart, Woodlawn, M/19
6:25p 100 E 56th, Washington Park, M/16
7:10p 4300 W Potomac, Humboldt Park, M/28
9:00p 4900 W Huron, Austin, M/38
10:15p 4100 S Sacramento, Brighton Park, M/19
10:20p 1900 W Garfield, New City, M/30
10:20p 1900 W Garfield, New City, M/30
(story)
Cubs lost
10:50p 1200 S Avers, North Lawndale, M/23
11:25p 3800 S Kedzie, Brighton Park, M/29
11:55p 7800 S South Shore, South Shore, M/30
Saturday 10/29
12:05a 1200 W 79th, Auburn Gresham, M/25
1:20a 500 S Central, Austin, M/14

2:00a 4100 W 19th, North Lawndale, M/38
2:00a 6000 S Loomis, Englewood, M/30
2:45a 900 W Oakdale, Lake View, M/23 (story)
2:45a 900 W Oakdale, Lake View, M/24
2:45a 900 W Oakdale, Lake View, F/23
3:50a 2600 S Keeler, Little Village, M/?
4:45a 5000 W Concord, Austin, M/36
12:10p 3900 W Jackson, Garfield Park, M/19
12:30p 1200 S Independence, North Lawndale, F/24
3:40p 3400 W Douglas, North Lawndale, M/18
4:50p 200 S Kostner, Garfield Park, M/16
5:25p 4400 S Prairie Ave, Grand Boulevard, M/33
5:40p 1000 W 14th, Near West Side, M/18
6:15p 4500 N Sheridan, Uptown, M/25
7:20p 1100 W 57th, Englewood, M/36
7:30p 8300 S Hermitage, Auburn Gresham, M/28
8:05p 4700 S Komensky, Archer Heights, M/19

8:30p 1800 S Karlov, North Lawndale, M/?
8:40p 7900 S Emerald, Auburn Gresham, F/36
8:40p 7900 S Emerald, Auburn Gresham, F/54
9:30p 8600 S Yates, South Chicago, M/20
Cubs lost again
10:50p 8400 S Parnell, Auburn Gresham, M/24
11:15p 7100 S Yates, South Shore, M/22
Sunday 10/30
12:45a 7800 S Christiana, Ashburn, M/22
12:45a 7800 S Christiana, Ashburn, M/25
12:45a 3400 W Hirsch, Humboldt Park, M/31
1:00a 7900 S Vernon, Chatham, M/?

2:20a 8600 S Morgan, Auburn Gresham, M/19
2:35a 10700 S Hoxie, South Deering, F/24
2:40a 2100 S Oakley, Lower W Side, M/20
2:40a 2100 S Oakley, Lower W Side, M/22
3:00a 2200 W Jackson, Near West Side, M/19
3:00a 2200 W Jackson, Near West Side, M/40
3:15a 1300 N Hudson, Near North Side, M/17
3:15a 1300 N Hudson, Near North Side, M/17

3:30a 12300 S Emerald, West Pullman, M/31
3:30a 12300 S Emerald, West Pullman, M/32
3:30a 12300 S Emerald, West Pullman, M/39
3:35a 1700 E 69th, South Shore, M/32
4:20a 11100 S State, Roseland, M/33
2:30p 2900 E 79th, South Shore, M/18
3:35p 8200 S Carpenter, Auburn Gresham, M/?
4:55p 700 N Harding, Humboldt Park, M/17
9:15p 6200 S Honroe, Englewood, M/40
CUBS WIN!!
Monday Overtime
2:05a 8000 S Exchange, South Chicago, F/37
4:00a 1100 W Garfield, New City, M/28

Key:
shooting
homicide
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday

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Bitch, Moan and Complain

Posted on Wednesday, October 26th, 2016

Crying babyOutside of Congress, CPS or the Bears, there likely isn’t a larger group of ineffective crybabies than the Chicago City Council. When not looking to ban something, raise taxes or take down a now offensive street sign they now like to waste our tax dollars crying about Cubs tickets, or lack thereof.

Chicago aldermen vented their anger Wednesday about the Cubs’ decision to yank a lucrative offer to let aldermen buy World Series tickets at face value.

“We were not the ones reaching out to the Cubs for some freebies or for some special treatment. The Cubs actually reached out to all of us to offer face-value tickets and those Cubs fans have to say yes. I said yes. I said of course I would like some tickets. We paid for them,” said Ald. Milly Santiago (31st), who described herself as a die-hard Cubs fan.

Santiago branded the controversy triggered by the Board of Ethics narrow interpretation of the city’s gift ban “kind of insulting, humiliating and embarrassing for us” for a perk that wasn’t all that hot.

“First of all, those tickets were not front-row tickets. They were all the way in the upper-deck. If I went like this, I would almost touch the ceiling. That’s how bad those tickets were,” Santiago said, lifting her arm over her head.

It’s often been said that when you find yourself in a hole, you stopping digging, instead they’re looking for a bigger shovel. And besides, cheap front row tickets are saved for more influential people, like “reverends”.

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The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Friday, October 21st, 2016

Harry Caray and Hillary Clinton

Final Stupidity Tally: 10 killed, 29 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 7 killed, 28 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 4 killed, 35 wounded

Friday 10/21
5:50p 6100 S Evans, Woodlawn, M/35
7:00p 5000 W Monroe, Austin, M/23
Saturday 10/22
12:25a 800 W Cuyler, Uptown, M/28
12:30a 2200 W Walnut, Near West Side, M/25
1:40a 4200 W Wilcox, Garfield Park, M/37
1:45a 100 W 110th, Roseland, M/30
3:00a 1000 W Belmont, Lake View, M/23 (story)
3:00a 1000 W Belmont, Lake View, M/36
3:00a 3700 W 25th, Little Village, M/17
9:55a 4900 S Hoyne, New City, M/?
10:15a 2200 S Trumbull, Little Village, M/20
12:40p 7900 S Francisco, Ashburn, M/16
6:00p 5300 S Maryland, Hyde Park, M/36
7:00p 5900 S Talman, Chicago Lawn, M/39
7:45p 8800 S Winchester, Auburn Gresham, M/15
7:45p 8800 S Winchester, Auburn Gresham, M/16
8:35p 8200 S Houston, South Chicago, M/31
9:40p 5300 S Aberdeen, New City, M/15
CUBS WIN!! CUBS WIN!! CUBS WIN!! CUBS WIN!! CUBS WIN!! CUBS WIN!! CUBS WIN!! CUBS WIN!!
11:40p 1100 W 81st, Auburn Gresham, M/20
Sunday 10/23
12:10a 7000 S Merrill, South Shore, M/23
12:30a 6300 N Mozart, West Ridge, F/21
1:50a 7300 N Sheridan, Rogers Park, M/27
2:10a 1500 S Christiana, North Lawndale, M/20

2:15a 5900 W Ohio, Austin, M/26
3:05a 2400 W Lexington, Near West Side, M/23
4:15a 300 N Pine, Austin, M/?
4:20a 5100 W North, Austin, M/39
4:25a 3900 S Sacramento, Brighton Park, M/24
5:00a 2800 S Pulaski, Little Village, M/?
5:00a 2100 S Western, Lower W Side, M/17
5:05a 2200 N Ashland, Logan Square, M/29
8:40a 6600 S Vernon, Woodlawn, M/45
10:00a 5900 S Princeton, Englewood, M/?
4:50p 1500 S Kolin, North Lawndale, M/59
6:10p 7000 S Racine, Englewood, M/33
6:10p 7000 S Racine, Englewood, F/38
6:50p 8000 S Sacramento, Ashburn, M/23
7:05p 1900 N Karlov, Hermosa, M/23
7:45p 1500 W 81st, Auburn Gresham, M/16

Key:
shooting
homicide
police involved
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday

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Rant

Posted on Tuesday, October 18th, 2016

RantOver the years, we’ve read thousands of crime related articles. Beyond the usual stats of who, what, when and where, occasionally there’s a little story telling describing the sights, sounds and sterling academic record of the deceased. Today is the first time we’ve read a genuine “f’ this, tired of paying for this shit” rant:

A neighbor, who only wanted to be identified by her first name Lisa, said she had just put her daughters to bed when she heard dozens of gunshots. She rushed back to their beds to make sure no bullets had come through the window.

“It’s just constant violence over here,” she said.

She said there is gunfire day and night, even when officers are posted nearby. “The police, they be on the blocks and they shooting,” she said. “We’ve got idiots with guns.”

Lisa said she and her family rarely leave the house. “We can’t use these bike lanes,” she said, gesturing to lines painted on Marquette Road. “They ought to take this stuff out of here. It’s useless.”

She said she owns two properties in the city and recently was told she would owe $12,000 in property taxes. “You want me to spend $12,000 and we can’t go in the yard?”

She nodded at the crime scene tape stretched across the block. “This is costing me,” she said. “I pay taxes. I pay for these schools to be built. I pay for these bodies to be dragged off the block.”

[…]

She said she wants to leave the city with her family, but her properties couldn’t sell for more than a fraction of their assessed value. “The price of everything goes up and the value goes down.”

Unfortunately, the bottom is still miles away.

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The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Friday, October 14th, 2016

Armed Firemen

Final Stupidity Tally: 10 killed, 42 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 3 killed, 20 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 3 killed, 22 wounded

Friday 10/14
12:30p 7000 S Sangamon, Englewood, M/19
2:30p 5400 W Walton, Austin, M/34
5:40p 2800 S Harding, Little Village, M/19
6:00p 4200 S Michigan, Grand Boulevard, M/26
6:50p 4500 W Maypole, Garfield Park, M/18
8:05p 4800 W Ferdinand, Austin, M/26 (not shot)
8:05p 5500 W Congress, Austin, M/18
8:05p 5500 W Congress, Austin, M/20
8:20p 3305 W Maypole, Garfield Park, M/?

8:20p 3305 W Maypole, Garfield Park, F/21
8:20p 3305 W Maypole, Garfield Park, F/22
8:20p 3305 W Maypole, Garfield Park, M/26
8:20p 3305 W Maypole, Garfield Park, M/27
8:20p 3305 W Maypole, Garfield Park, M/31
8:20p 3305 W Maypole, Garfield Park, M/34
8:55p 6000 N Talman, West Ridge, M/26
11:55p 6500 S Talman, Chicago Lawn, M/34
Saturday 10/15
12:25a 8800 S Marshfield, Auburn Gresham, M/26
1:10a 4700 W Van Buren, Austin, M/28
2:20a 2300 N Normandy, Montclare, M/17
4:00a Aw man, my bad dawg!
4:25a 6100 S Rhodes, Woodlawn, M/26
5:00a 3600 W 31st, Little Village, M/25
5:35a 7800 S Sawyer, Ashburn, M/37
7:00a 2600 W 24th, Little Village, M/26
1:00p 3700 S Langley, Oakland, M/29
1:20p 4800 W Congress, Austin, M/46
3:40p 700 S Kenneth, Garfield Park, M/40
4:30p 8100 S Peoria, Auburn Gresham, M/24
4:40p 300 W 95th, Roseland, M/24
5:20p 3600 S Lake Park, Oakland, M/62 (#600)
7:40p 1000 S Oakley, Near West Side, M/?
8:55p 1100 W Wilson, Uptown, M/24
CUBS WIN!!
9:50p 5100 S Trumbull, Gage Park, M/37
10:40p 1000 W 14th, Near West Side, M/25
Sunday 10/16
1:45a 3000 W Van Buren, Garfield Park, M/25
1:45a 700 N Ridgeway, Humboldt Park, M/28
2:10a 200 N Kedzie, Garfield Park, M/32
2:50a 4200 S Cicero, Garfield Ridge, M/23
4:20a 1800 S Kostner, North Lawndale, M/32
4:20a 3100 W 54th, Gage Park, F/41
4:45a 8300 S Ada, Auburn Gresham, M/?
1:05p 100 W 95th, Roseland, M/23
2:00p 9400 S Forest, Roseland, M/20
5:05p 8000 S Bishop, Auburn Gresham, F/21
6:10p 6800 S Rockwell, Chicago Lawn, M/?
6:30p 4700 S King, Grand Boulevard, M/24
8:00p 1600 W 119th, Morgan Park, M/33
8:50p 4500 N Hazel, Uptown, M/25 (story)
9:00p 3600 N Sawyer Ave, Irving Park, M/20
cubs lose
9:15p 2300 N Monitor, Belmont Cragin, M/17
9:45p 1000 N Cicero, Austin, M/? (story)
Monday Overtime
12:10a 3900 S Wells, Fuller Park, M/24

Key:
shooting
homicide
police involved
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday

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Cold Cocked

Posted on Wednesday, October 12th, 2016

Punch in the face. As one of the leading scholars of our time, Mike Tyson, once said, “Everyone has a plan ’till they get punched in the mouth.” In this case, the punch involved a Thermos:

“A mysterious good Samaritan came to the aid of a woman getting mugged at an Andersonville bus stop, cold-cocking the attacker with a Thermos and leaving him on the ground for police to clean up, authorities said.

But authorities don’t know who swung the Thermos: The good Samaritan took off before officers arrived, leaving a bus stop full of witnesses to tell the tale.

[…]

Several witnesses who stuck around told police what happened, but the good Samaritan was gone, according to a police report.”

Well done sir, whoever you may be.

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The Weekend’s Stupidity

Posted on Friday, October 7th, 2016

CPD officer inspect bullet holes in a window

Final Stupidity Tally: 7 killed, 39 wounded
2015 weekend tally: 5 killed, 16 wounded
2014 weekend tally: 4 killed, 18 wounded

Friday 10/7
12:35p 1600 N Leclaire, Austin, M/20
12:35p 1600 N Leclaire, Austin, M/57
2:30p 200 W 105th, Roseland, M/30
2:25p 10200 S Wentworth, Roseland, M/25
6:55p 1400 S Springfield, North Lawndale, M/16
7:00p 3000 S King, Douglas, F/28 (murder/suicide)
9:05p 6800 S Paulina, Englewood, M/13
9:30p 400 E 79th, Grand Crossing, M/38
9:55p 5400 W North, Austin, M/27
9:55p 1400 N Lawler, Austin, M/24
CUBS WIN!!!
11:30p 300 N Pine, Austin, M/35
Saturday 10/8
12:35a 2800 W Cermak, Little Village, M/29
1:40a 400 W 75th, Grand Crossing, M/68
2:00a 3800 S State, Douglas, M/35
2:45a 5700 S Sangamon, Englewood, M/26
12:10p 7100 S Wabash, Grand Crossing, M/28
1:35p 3800 W Huron, Humboldt Park, M/30
7:30p 2100 W Devon, West Ridge, F/24 (not shot)
9:25p 9500 S Green, Washington Heights, M/32
9:25p 9500 S Green, Washington Heights, M/34
9:25p 9500 S Green, Washington Heights, M/35
9:40p 10500 S Wallace, Roseland, M/15
9:40p 10500 S Wallace, Roseland, M/17
CUBS WIN!!!
11:50p 2600 N Hoyne, Lincoln Park, M/17
Sunday 10/9
2:40a 700 S California, Garfield Park, M/32
3:45a 3000 S Avers, Little Village, M/34
4:00a 4800 S Bishop, New City, M/24
4:00a 4800 S Bishop, New City, M/32
4:20a 3100 S Central Park, Little Village, M/30
4:40a 3900 W Chicago, Humboldt Park, M/28
5:20a 3400 W Harrison, Garfield Park, M/31
12:35p 1500 W Marquette, Englewood, M/23
4:40p 7700 S Peoria, Auburn Gresham, M/32
7:15p 5500 W Corcoran, Austin, M/22
7:15p 5500 W Corcoran, Austin, M/23
7:55p 3900 W Gladys, Garfield Park, M/22
9:10p 1800 N Mayfield, Austin, M/22

9:10p 1800 N Mayfield, Austin, M/24
10:00p 5500 W North, Austin, M/35
10:00p 5500 W North, Austin, M/36
10:20p 700 W 119th, West Pullman, M/45
11:35p 6700 S Union, Englewood, M/26
Monday Overtime
12:05a 2100 S Trumbull, North Lawndale, M/16
2:00a 900 N Lawndale, Humboldt Park, M/32
5:30a 2900 W Montrose, Albany Park, M/32

Key:
shooting
homicide
Weekend = 12p Friday – 6a Monday

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